I’m a single mother of 3 young children. Stress and difficulty sleeping led me to ambien. I fell down mybasement stairs. I have a a skull fraxture, broken neck and nose. I have facial scars i wont recover from. But im alive. My children still have their mom

I came across eyonvere’s stories and postings as I was searching for how many Ambien would kill you as I myself am in a very dark place and can’t seem to get out of my own bad thoughts and feelings. I am the person that if I did commit suicide eyonvere around me would ask why did he do it, I wouldn’t have ever guessed he’d be the type, he’s extremely attractive and has everything going for him . Unfortunately what people don’t know about me, I feel is killing me on the inside. I honestly look like Superman (I have the curl in my hair and everything), used to have a Perfect Hollywood smile but smashed up my teeth in a simple fall on rollerblades, I have had HIV for 8 years and at the beginning of 2011 found out I have Herpes as well. People around me always ask me how in the world could you be single , but they don’t know I’m diseased. I am also gay and believe in Honesty, Monogamy, and No Drugs and in gay culture it means it’s just about impossible to find anyone who feels the same as most gay men just want to have anonymous sex with as many guys as they can and never want to date, but then throw in HIV and Herpes and no one wants to touch me. I have worked in non-profit for 10+ years helping other people with HIV education and always wanting to give. All I want in this life is to be married to another quality man, live in a simple house, raise 2 children. Unfortunately I can’t have my own children as I have HIV and no woman would want to be artifically inseminated from someone who has HIV, even with modern technology of cleaning the HIV from semen. I feel my purpose in life has been taken away from me. On top of this I am also in debt $36,000 and don’t have a full time job. I continue to sink further and further into a dark hole and don’t see a way out. I’ve been single for 10 years and don’t care to have random sex .as I have before and that got me HIV and herpes. I honestly feel like a rape victim, I got something I didn’t ask for, I feel gross and ugly even though on the outside I’m attractive to other people. As I was reading the other comments I was in tears knowing other people out there feel the same as myself, the pain is overwhelming. For me the people around me wouldn’t be really affected by my leaving them. I have parents that ignored me as a child and never cherish and valued who I was. I had a 4.0 GPA up until about the age of 16 when I could drive and be around other gay people ..people who understood me. I am 31 years old now and can’t stop thinking about how better my life could have been if there were supportive people around, parents who truely loved me, cheered me on through my struggles and got me to push harder. As a male I feel insane pressure from society to provide everything, and as a gay man it just seems expected that I should have some great career and it’s not acceptable to say I want to raise a family, I want to stay at home and provide for my loved ones . I didn’t ask for this life, I didn’t ask to be put on earth and be pushed to insane limits of stress and depression. I would like to think God will make it better, that some magic force will allow me to heal and feel wonderful .unfortunately this hasn’t been the case. My thoughts continue to spiral further and further downwards.If anyone knows of personal ways to get out of this funk please tell me/us. The personal pain is far too intense. I am not on ambien now, but have realized that if I were to kill myself it would be with sleeping pills. I couldn’t cut my wrists or shoot myself in the head. I just want to go to sleep and that’s it. My writing this long comment is my way of yelling out that I need help. I have called a suicide hotline and it did help for a day to be able to tell someone I was thinking of dieing, but that feeling of strength has quickly gone away.There is so much more I could write about how I feel and what’s wrong, but I figure someone out there gets the basic idea of what I’m up against in life. I hope for the best for all of us, that some miracle will rescue us, or atleast put us out of our misery, and if we take our own lives that we end up in a better place, a place without pain, a place of acceptance and answers and good feelings.

I was taking ambien for about 5 years for the treatment of insomnia.. I first found out that I was making phone calls to people without any knowlege of ever speaking to them..they actually starting to refer to my calls as “the ambien phone call”. I really didn’t think this was a big deal when it came to sleep or no sleep…however, in April of 2010 I woke up to a huge 2nd degree burn on my arm…I had no clue how it got there…I live alone, so noone was there to tell me…I opened the fridge where I found a pefectly cooked, half eaten london broil, all wrapped up pefectly…I then went to the oven and saw that the broiler pan was dropped inside the oven, so I was able to put together, with out one bit of a recollection that I cooked and when taking it out of the oven, dropped it,and burned myself.. Unfortunately it wasn’t till my next ambien sleepwalk that I decided to switch to a new medication. In June of 2010, I evidently felt the need to get up and take a shower while sleeping…I woke up after slipping and cracking my chin on the rim of the tub…I prayed not to fall asleep because I wa afraid I would drown as I couldn’t move..10 minutes later, I was able to get up, walked to my bed and went back to sleep…In Sept or Oct I went to the doc’s because I was having migraines and he asked me if I had fallen I told him I did months ago…From the fall I herniated 2 discs C5-C6..I have carpal tunnel in both arms and a pinched nerve in my right wrist. I recently went back to my doc because I finally rec’d my coverage back, and my arms have been dibilitating only to find out that I now have degeneritive disc disease and spinal stenosis…I switched over to lunesta right after that incident, however, it was too late, and unfortunately my way of life has been adjusted…I stopped working 3 months ago because I can no longer lift things and I worked as an organizer for an estate sale company…I have an appt. for a neurosurgeon and my doctor wants me to start physical therapy now. I am posting this so that anyone who plans to take ambien or if you already are on it , just say no…there are to many stories out there of others who have taken it.

I took ambien in 2004 and had 2 accidents because I was affected by ambien the next day. Nearly killed my wife and I when I blanked out while driving. I tried to get someone to listen for years. I joined a class action suit only to get kicked out because the only side effects that are legally recognized are sleep eating and and driving. The fact that ambien is still very active the next day has never been realized, and as I found out. Getting the 7-8 hrs. is not the full story with ambien. Thousands of lives have been ruined by ambien, but they reason that it helps millions. The greater good rules.god help the little guy!

I have been taking Ambien off and on as needed for many years. This Wednesday night I took it at 12:30am…I woke up at 9:30am (so I got 1 hour over the recommended 8 hours). I had an appointment so I got out of bed at about 10:30 and started getting ready. I left my house to stop at a dept. store than to pick up some meds at the store 1 1/2 block down. As I was walking through the dept store talking to my daughter on the phone…all of a sudden I felt strange….I wasn’t aware but my daughter said I wasn’t making any sense so she called my husband and told him. The rest of the day was a total daze. I remember bumping into a counter at the dept store…than I remember resting on the counter at kaiser and telling them that I think I’m gonna pass out. Than the next time I came to I was in the emergency room and my husband was with me. The next time I came to after that was in the middle of having an MRI. When I finally came to my husband told me that my car was wrecked. The insurance company have the damage up to 2,000 dollars. Numerous test was ran and I spent the night in the hospital, only to hear that what happened was because of the Ambien. A friend called me tonight to let me know that she was talking to someone and they told her that this has happened a lot of time to people on Ambien. I could have been killed or killed someone. I gave the med the 8 hours and I was still affected. People need to know about this….it could save their lives or other people lives.